Story of Seasons Friends of Mineral Town: A remake of a classic, if you can ignore the wokeness.

ANOTHER game I wasn’t going to review. Yes, even I like a calm farming RPG after blowing up spaceships, making shady business dealings in the future, and ripping demons into small bloody chunks. I loved Harvest Moon: Back to Nature for the PS1 back in the day (an updated, at the time, Friends of Mineral Town). So I was very excited about the remake of Friends of Mineral Town Story of Seasons remake (SoS is the new title for the real Harvest Moon games, don’t ask, it’s a whole thing). So what’s my problem with this charming farm JRPG? THEY MADE IT WOKE!

Note: This is for the western version only, the Japanese version does not include the main problem I have, as described below.

Gender: 2 out of 5: You can play as a boy or a girl though the game doesn’t change much if you do. I find it interesting the girl character can do farm work while pregnant but I’m sure it’s done for balancing issues (it would be unfair to have your character lose a month while she waits to get birth.) Besides that, the male/female dynamic is pretty traditional.

Sexuality: 4 out of 5: THIS. So, in the game you have characters you can romance and eventually start a family with. There are 6 bachelorettes for the boys, and 6 bachelors for the girls. Every time you meet one of these potential mates you get a cut scene you’re forced to play through. This also goes for any “romance” scenes you trigger just going about your day. However, the western version of the game decided to add gay marriage, so now there are 12 marriage candidates no matter what gender you are. This means, twice the amount of annoying cut scenes you end up triggering every game. This is the reason I rated it so high, it actively interrupts gameplay. No, I don’t want to flirt, Rick. Rick is the worst!

Race: 1 out of 5: Well, it’s a Japanese game so most characters are the same race. That’s right: Caucasian. Seriously though, you can make your farmer dark skinned or lighter skinned (there’s literally only three options). There’s also Kai, who’s dark skinned, but he lives on an island and only visits during the summer so maybe he’s just tan?

SCREW YOU , RICK! NO ONE LIKES YOU!

Anachronism: 1 out of 5: Some modern conveniences, like a TV and a phone, are present but otherwise this game could take place at any time.

Overall: 8 out of 20: Still a fun time if you enjoyed the original and can ignore the forced attempts to be woke. Also, the female marriage candidates no longer look like pre-teens! (Except for Popuri for some reason), so, sorry if you’re into that sorta thing.

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